BETTER SEX! SOMETIMES! TOO MUCH TO ASK!

// May 9th, 2009 // Hott Topics

when burning desires that burn too deep

“… the reality check kicks in and you catch yourself”

Agree or disagree, is a statement! Not a question! … LOL!

One beautiful thing about the human experience is that we all share an amazing instinct and drive for passion, intimacy and sexual bond.

If you are like most, you will hate to admit it, but deep inside you can help it, but notice the appeal of the sex tip headlines that populate the magazine covers of Cosmopolitan, Jane Allure, In-Style and others!

By some magical universal force the eye’s just get stuck on those juicy phrases: “Hottest Sex Ever”, “Make Him Beg Tonight”, or “Mind Blowing Orgasm Secret”.

But the reality check kicks in and you catch yourself.

You remember what happened the last time you acted on that promising sex tip! Forget that! No more embarrassing bedroom moments, of trying to talk dirty or cover yourself in whip cream.

The lesson here is simple.

Your instincts are right – your curiosity and sense of sexual adventure is to be celebrated! Do not suppress or be ashamed of your erotic desires.

Just be aware of the true lesson of trying to apply sex tips.

Just learning new sex positions or techniques as though it was something TO DO to your partner can lead to the faulty thinking of a “do this” and “get that” mindset.

What happens here, will kill intimacy faster than incorrectly calling out your lovers name!

The “do this” and “get that” mind set is the polar opposite of honest and true intimacy. What you do is reduce our partner to an object. Also, you bring a control and power element, which when not consented, is lethal to building intimacy.

Having sexual outcome goals is not wrong, but they should not be outcome goals. Rather they should be process-goals! Passion in the bedroom is born from intimacy. Its not about doing and getting it really means “being together” and sharing.

Just think of all the information on sexual advice.

Techniques by themselves are never enough because they do not include reality and context of the lovers as a couple. Before a technique can have benefit it must be shared direct or indirectly with your partner. In other words,

We all fall into this sex trap at some point in our sex life — how many of us have purchased or borrowed a Kama Sutra book?